Grab Bag #17: Catfish, Pink Snapper, and Swordfish

It's only fitting that I fell asleep talking to a friend about Seafood, and then I wake up to this shit:


* So, MTV (The Channel Formerly Known as "Music Television") has a new reality show out called Catfish. As you know, I'm 23 going on 46 so I get lost in some of these terms. I didn't know that Catfish is a term for people who make fake profiles on Facebook or Twitter or whatever social media site you prefer, and then bait people into having online relationships with them,

In Episode 1 (according to Wikipedia, there will be 12 of these. holy fuck) we have a guy from Georgia who has been talking to a girl named Abigail (Abby) from Biloxi, Miss. They have chatted on Facebook for over a year and have talked on the phone, but haven't met each other. They have had some hardcore messages like (OMG I Luv U Foreverrrrrrr!!! <3 Marry Meeee" kinda shit) But when Georgia dude wanted to meet the love of his life, she had an "Unexpected Family Emergency" come up. (Women are real good for pulling that shit.. Just saying) and so he contacted this show to finally get to meet Abby, who according to her Facebook profile, is a dainty looking slim blonde gal. Fairly easy on the eyes. They chat, he drops the deal that there's this MTV show, I wanna meet ya, blah blah blah.

So she kinda tries to duck the meeting but agrees anyway. So now Georgia dude (Jarrod is his name, just remembered that) goes to Biloxi to meet Abby. They pull up to what looks like a fucking mini barn or an old slave quarters and knock on the stable Front Door and there's no answer. Walk around to the side and there is a brunette standing outside, Not Abby. It's Melissa. The Real Person Jarrod was talking to! It's like the 1-900 Phone Sex Bait and Switch for the 21st Century! Now don't get me wrong, the fact that Melissa isn't like Abby in the photo sense but the fact that she fucking lied to him about EVERYTHING!!! And then blamed it on her self-esteem issues. Um, Lady do you realise this is fucking fraud and could have gotten you into some serious trouble. If you can't face someone then work that issue out on your time, now you dragged this guy's heart through babyshit because you can't  deal with yourself? you selfish stupid bitch. And of course she keeps saying, "But I do care about him" The Fuck You Do! You were another person for a year plus and didn't once ever think this shit would hit the fan.

I have done online dating, and I am against it. I believe people should stop being such fucking introverts and go meet people when they go outside. But for Tebow's sake, You can possibly think this catfish shit will work if you try it. Just dumb. Get a life.

* In creepy Celebrity news, Anne Hathaway (drool) is in the film adaptation of Les Miserables, and at the Red Carpet Premier, not only was she wearing this hot bondage style leather wraparound kinda dress but she left the dessert tray off the pie if you know what I mean, Here's the Safe for Work version (E-mail courtsideseatstohell@gmail.com if you wanna see the other one)

To be honest, It wasn't as bad as other car shots we've seen. I could do a slideshow but most of us are reading this at work.

* I'm making Swordfish tonight, Here's the recipe I will be using for Ponzu Sauce:

1/2 cup low-sodium soy sauce

1/4 cup fresh orange juice

2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice

1 tablespoon water

1 tablespoon sweet rice wine

1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper

Combine all ingredients in a bowl. Cover and chill.

That's all for now. Have a Swimmingly awesome Hump Day today!