August 26, 2013

Well Now You Know, Miley's A Hoe: My Brief Ranting Recap of Twerkgate

So Sunday Night, on The Channel Formerly Known as Music Television held it's annual Music Video Awards. And talentless Pop artist Miley Cyrus went and did this:


You probably have the same reaction I did after this shitfuckmess was over. What just fucking happened? Who let this high school girl snort painkiller and drink tequila? where is her ass? Why does Robin Thicke look like Beetlejuice? So many questions. I'll answer a couple for you.

1. Society pisses me off. One of the main reasons why we are so sickened/confused/whatever about Miley Cyrus is because she looked horrible in her "twerking" efforts. If she had been 20-25 pounds heavier, we'd be talking about this the same way we were amazed back when J. Lo had on that hot ass dress. But no one is going to say that because the media wants women to look like cocaine is back on the rise. Fucking bullshit.

2. There's a large mass of people who find this shit actually entertaining. Lots of people have problems, I understand that. But this was supposed to be a musical performance, this basically is a shit-show cast off sketch from a small-town Circus.

3. I'm not shocked that the Former "Hannah Montana" has turned into this slut. We all should have seen this coming when she was actually decent looking in a denim miniskirt and cowboy boots. Now she's basically at the point where we'll see a tape of her in a interracial gangbang surface on PornHub within the next 6 months. People take that Disney shit all seriously like that's their real life, You shoulda learned yesterday with Britney Spears' crazy ass. But y'all learned today with this one.

I would like to make one note of light: This whole travashamockery was save by the brief performance from Kendrick Lamar. One of the gems of not only Hip-Hop, but of all Music out right now. Big ups to Kendrick on that. He got robbed for Best Hip-Hop Video. Macklebore and his pissy 99 cent grandpa jacket couldn't hold a candle to anything Mr. Lamar has done.